Jaclyn Beckerman Coaching

You’ve heard me talk about Sacred Center before and how much I LOVE this spiritual center and going there has made a significant impact on my life.

Well this is in part because I adore Rev. August Gold who is spiritual yet admirably grounded, incredibly funny and fiercely loving.

So it breaks my heart to have found out yesterday that she (and her partner Carol) will be leaving Sacred Center. She’s going outside the church walls to bring the spiritual message to folks who won’t enter the church  to hear it.  She says while she was called by Spirit to found the church, she won’t be the one to grow it.  And so long as she remains the face of the church, and it’s basically her, it cannot grow.

I’ll be honest, I’m kind of heart broken and may have cried a bit yesterday when this news was shared.  I’m still in a bit of shock and disbelief.

While I’m happy she’ll be bringing the message to a broader audience who needs it (a journey I myself feel called to as well with transformational and spiritual work), I still wish she would do both and continue to lead at Sacred Center as well.

I’m also really wondering (and concerned to be honest) what’s going to happen at the church moving forward as I really believe a significant amount of people come there specifically because of her.  Will the new head spiritual director be able to step it up to the same level?  I hope she can.

I’m finding myself being a bit cynical and expecting it won’t thrive and the new lead won’t be able to fill Rev. Gold’s shoes.  Only in this moment do I realize that that’s just my own ‘story’ (or racket for you landmark folk) and I need to get off it.  Something can only make a difference for you if you empower it to do so.  If you’re not open to it, the greatest miracle in the world won’t provide a penny’s worth of value.  So I’m going to choose to be open to this new change and the possibility of it being amazing and inspiring.

For anyone who attends Sacred Center – what are your thoughts on this change?  How are you dealing with your feelings/emotions around it?

Or if you’re not involved with Sacred Center – have you had (or where are you having) an experience like this where something you loved suddenly changed drastically?  What did you do and what did/could you do (or not do) to empower the situation?

I’m feeling the need to share that I don’t like talking about my business in my posts.  There’s something about looking good and avoiding looking bad that consistently keeps me from writing about wins (or breakdowns) or lessons I learn in my business.

I’ve taken my willingness to be vulnerable with people to a whole different level just by starting this blog yet it’s clear to me that I’m not sharing things that would definitely be of value to folks in order to save face or avoid being judged.  It’s funny because I imagine it’s easy for people to judge lots of the things I talk about in my posts anyway yet for some reason when it comes to my business, I get far more confronted than by other topics.

I think we all do this.  We don’t share authentically with everyone what’s really going on in certain areas of our lives because we judge that they should be going or certain way or shouldn’t be going however they are.

Something fabulous that one of my clients said today was that in looking at how things were in the past (actually just a few months ago), she saw that they had to go the way they did and she had to go through what she did in order to get where she is now.  And because of that, she could see that the process was perfect.  Because today she feels empowered and liberated from some limiting beliefs that had a stronghold on her for most of her life.  But couldn’t have gotten here without going through the muck.  By the same logic, you can’t get where you want to go without going through whatever is in the way and breaking it down.  So naturally then, where you are too is perfect.  And there’s simply still work to be done to get the results you want.

So the thing I want to share about my business today is that I’ve had a breakthrough in it recently.  I shared in my post, Give It All Away, that I finally understood that I wasn’t getting what I wanted in life because I wasn’t giving it to the universe.  I said I wanted to be a contribution and to have a thriving coaching practice but I certainly wasn’t consistently having new clients sign up.  What I see is that I was actually being really stingy with both myself and others – more interested in what I could gain for myself than what I could give away to others and life.

What I didn’t share about my experience that day at Sacred Center was that this understanding that I needed to give to the universe what I was looking to have myself really moved to give more than my usual $2 or $3 donation when they passed the baskets around.  Instead, I filled out a credit card slip and donated $20.  This may or may not seem like a huge deal to you but for me it was an act of giving away the thing I’d been struggling to bring in to myself to something I love – without the story of ‘I can’t afford to do this’ or ‘I need to save money’ or ‘This is irresponsible’ attached to it.  I was contributing to something I saw as wonderful in the world instead of looking to be contributed to.  And it felt great.  Her message (I recommend reading the post if you haven’t already) had really shifted my perception of who I was being in the world.

The magic, the reason this is so significant to share, is that the very next day, I had a new client hire me.  While I know I’m a great coach and provide a lot of value for people, actually bringing in new business had definitely not been my strong suit in the past.  So just believe me when I say that this blatant manifestation of the law of attraction was pretty phenomenal.

I have been living and being from this place ever since.  Very aware of my intentions and solely out to contribute to people whether they are friends, prospects, clients, colleagues or family.

This past Sunday at Sacred Center, when they passed the donation baskets around, I at first gave $3, then I decided that was too stingy and was compelled to give more and added another $5.  I also did a workshop which I knew I wanted to participate in and was another $10.  I only had one sample session set up for this week, my first since that last one.  Now THIS prospect, who is wonderful and my ideal client, hired me as well.

More and more I’m feeling confident and certain that my practice is going to thrive and I will be able to serve myself by serving others!  My dream is to support as many people as possible in transforming their lives to be the life of their dreams! (In the future that will also include books and inspirational speaking!) And I must say, living (and loving) from this place and creating this life is SO exciting and rewarding!

What do you see would be possible for YOU if you started living from a space of contributing rather than ‘getting your needs met’ or ‘what’s in it for you’?  (And lets be honest, ‘what’s in it for you’ tends to dominate most folks way of being whether they intend it to or not.)

…and you’ll get it back 1000 fold.

Rev. Gold talked about the law of attraction in her message at Sunday’s service.

Phenomenal message.  She said anything you seek is seeking you.

We are constantly asking what can life do for me when what we should be asking is “What can I do for life?”  It blew my mind how similar this was to the breakthrough I had and wrote about in my blog post a couple weeks ago, Sharing My Heart.

We can’t have what we want until we generate it within ourselves and give it away.  EVERYTHING is already within you.  Put out a hand and ask for life to give to you and you will just end up with an empty hand.  You can only receive what you want when you give it away first.

I believe it’s the Koran that says ‘take one step towards me and I will take a thousand toward you’.  The smaller and stingier we give of ourselves the less we get in return.  When we move in the direction of our hearts and our own personal truth, and give to life, we then create space for that thing to exist within our lives.  When we hold a mentality of abundance, we are then attracting and open to receiving abundance.  When we are generous, the world is generous with us.

It seems so simple yet par for the course of humanity, we make even the most common sense concepts unendingly complicated.

The law of correspondence (or attraction) says that what you yourself are bringing to life, life, like a mirror, reflects that back to you.  Said more plainly, life will reflect back to you that which you have given to life.

The light bulb went on that I have definitely not been giving my best everywhere so of course I’m not getting it back in return.  How could I?!  You can only get what you put out there.

Talk about motivation.

This story was relayed to me in my Landmark Forum in Action seminar last night.  It really struck me as incredibly insightful and inspiring and I wanted to share it with you.  Please let me know your thoughts in the comments section below!

The Sense of the Goose

In the fall when you see geese heading south for the winter flying in the “V” formation, you might be interested in knowing what science has discovered about why they fly that way. It has been learned that as each bird flaps its wings, it creates uplift for the bird immediately following. By flying in a “V” formation, the whole flock adds at least 71% greater range than if each bird flew on its own.

Lesson: People who are a part of a team and share a common direction get where they are going quicker and easier, because they are going quicker and easier and because they are traveling on the trust of one another.

Whenever a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of trying to go through it alone and quickly gets back into formation to take advantage of the power of the flock.

Lesson: If we have as much sense as a goose, we will share information with those who are headed the same way we are going.

When the lead goose gets tired, he rotates back in the wing and another goose takes over.

Lesson: It pays to share leadership and take turns doing hard jobs.

The geese honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep their speed.

Lesson: Words of support and inspiration help energize those on the front line, helping them to keep pace in spite of the day-to-day pressures and fatigue.

Finally, when a goose gets sick or is wounded by a gun shot and falls out, two geese fall out of the formation and follow the injured one down to help and protect him. They stay with him until he is either able to fly or until he is dead, and then they launch out with another formation to catch up with their group.

Lesson: If we have the sense of a goose, we will stand by each other when things get rough.

The next time you see a formation of geese, remember: it is a reward, a challenge and a privilege to be contributing to a team!

(Author unknown)

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This seems to have come at the perfect time since in my post yesterday I spoke of only fostering relationships with amazing people from now on.  This story really just reinforces what I’ve already realized: that (for me) being with like-minded people who are raising their vibration (or spiritual consciousness) or doing transformational work inspires me to be bigger, bolder and step further into my leadership.

Conversely, I can see that being with folks who are very judgmental or pessimistic pulls you into their vortex of negativity and drains you.  So again, the message is, surround yourself with those who bring you up, not down!

Being with other leaders who have courageously taken on this kind of work allows me to step up and take on the challenge of learning to lead effectively and as a team part of the time while allowing others to take the lead and supporting them other times.

The bottom line is: the weight of the world does not have to rest on my shoulders alone. Which I think it may seem like sometimes. I have wonderful people I can enroll in supporting me in whatever way I need because they love and care about me – and I get to do the same for them.  These people most definitely challenge and inspire me.  From my leadership team in Accomplishment Coaching, to all my fellow participants in Landmark, to the folks I meet at Sacred Center and Siddha Yoga and the various other spiritual, mental, emotional and physical venues of my life. I have to say, it’s pretty amazing to realize the vast richness of the resources I have and am creating.

I thought the previous post describing Sacred Center was getting too long so decided to break off my experience of today into a new post.

In part of today’s message Rev. Gold read a bit from David Whyte’s poem, Sweet Darkness, that I found so beautiful and worth sharing.

You must learn one thing.

The world was made to be free in.

Give up all the other worlds

except the one to which you belong.

Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet

confinement of your aloneness

to learn that

anything or anyone

that does not bring you alive

you have made too small for you.

I’m going to focus on the last part of this: “Anyone or anything that doesn’t make you come ALIVE, you’ve made too small for you.” Wow. Talk about inspiring.

Now, at first I though she said ‘IS too small for you’, which is different. I’ve always been one to abandon things that don’t (or no longer) make me feel alive and happy. (And since I love ‘getting things right’, I thought: insert victory dance here). There’s obvious potential danger in that of course because with my self diagnosis of chronic ennui, I’ve got a knack for being pretty masterful at avoiding making commitments. So this partly plays into my automatic way of being (which is nothing to throw a party for). As a side note, I’ve made a ton of progress in this area by making bold commitments in the face of my resistance (ie. leading a coach training program, stepping up as a group leader in my Landmark forum seminar…). AND when I DO make a commitment, I’m always 100% all in. Which is why I like to avoid them so stealthily.

Now, looking at that if something or someone doesn’t make me come alive, I’VE MADE them too small for me. That’s interesting. There are many ways to look at that. It could be that I keep choosing people that don’t treat me right or situations that don’t make me come alive – that I’m constantly settling for less than I could have or manifest (probably because some part of me still doesn’t truly believe I deserve the pot of gold). This certainly feels familiar (albeit a bit uncomfortable) and I can see that I do that often enough – especially with people. It could refer to where I squander the possibility of realizing what I’m capable of and who I’m capable of being by making myself smaller to fit in someone else’s box. It could also mean that in my mind I’m making a situation or person smaller than it really is. I’m only seeing one narrow, small perspective or view of them/it that doesn’t show me the jewel or gift available to me which would help me grow and live a bigger life.

What do you see for yourself?

Rev. Gold spoke of recognizing the breakthrough available in every breakdown. (Talk about a coaching concept..) That we need to raise our consciousness above the ‘problems’ that we’re trying to deal with or fix because from that place nothing new will come. Fixing a problem always eventually leads to another problem that needs to be fixed because nothing new ever occurs – and you could spend your entire life fixing problems. You cannot solve problems at the same level of consciousness at which they were created (Einstein). You have to raise your level of consciousness and see the bigger picture, look through your heart (instead of your head) and find the gold the universe is trying to provide you with. She said prayers are always answered when we realize our part in them, because they are answered through us. Not outside of us. We are the doorway (‘between heaven and earth’). So we have to open our eyes and see what’s in front of us otherwise we miss the gifts life has to offer, that are often staring us in the face.

All very thought-provoking. Very inspiring.

After just returning from a 2 week vacation, I’d say this was a great way to start the week…

Happy Sunday,

Jaclyn

God I love this place. I’ve decided it deserves it’s own post.

Sacred Center is a non-denominational church (which the Jew on me insists on calling a spiritual center) based heavily on the teachings of the Tao Te Ching & The Science of Mind. (It’s located at the Church of St Paul & St Andrew on the NE corner of 86th & West End – http://sacredcenterny.org). From their website:

We are a non-religious church that is open to everyone regardless of race, religion, culture or sexual orientation. We teach spirituality, a blend of Western teachings with Eastern philosophies to create the foundation and spiritual practice that has become our life. We are passionate and dedicated to helping you experience the Living God in every area of your life.

Our Teachers are:
* Jesus of Nazareth
* Lao Tsu and the Tao Te Ching
* Ernest Holmes and The Science of Mind
* Charles & Myrtle Fillmore and Unity
* Joel Goldsmith and The Infinite Way
* The mystical stories of the Old & New Testaments
* Bhagavad-Gita – and so many more.

I think it’s akin to Agape in LA if you know of that – I’ve never been to Agape but from what I’ve heard of it they seem well aligned. It’s seriously incredible and they constantly speak of opening your heart and stepping into your own personal path and truth, accepting yourself as you are while taking on your bigness and greatness. I used to go fairly regularly for awhile. I fell off the wagon over the summer and fall but am working on being more consistent again in attending.

Reverend August Gold started the center and is an incredible speaker – she has a fabulous sense of humor and is unendingly inspirational and compassionate while at that same time embracing and sharing her humanity. She’s a gay, Jewish minister. Needless to say I find this quite impressive. I consistently and emphatically endorse her as an incredible spiritual teacher to anyone interested in embracing or enhancing their spirituality in any way.

Being there is such an uplifting experience. Everyone sings and is so joyful and hopeful about life. One of my friends who has always felt repressed and punished by the Christian church (for being who he is) has said that each time he goes to Sacred Center it’s like healing a year of the time (and ensuing bitterness) he was forced to go to Christian church. So if you’re looking for some healing and inspiration, definitely check it out.

Check out the following post for what I took from today’s message.