Jaclyn Beckerman Coaching

Do any of you get Tut’s ‘notes from the universe’?

They’re pretty amazing.

Yesterday I got one that said the following:

If you knew how much you have in common with every single person now living in time and space Jaclyn – in terms of your greatest hopes and dreams, and your deepest fears and worries – you’d wonder how I manage to tell you all apart.

And from this day forward you’d likely think of every single one of them as “dearest,” just as I do.

Tallyho,

The Universe

I always find it so humbling to realize that everyone else is so incredibly similar to me.  Internally we all have the same kind of stuff going on.  Whether our beliefs and values differ or not is irrelevant because we are all human beings – born as beings of love who developed and inherited (similar) fears along the way.

Even if you judge someone to be a cruel or heartless person, at their core they are love.  They may not be very evolved beings (or spirits), and may have added a lot of fears and negative views of the world to their perspective, but think of when they were babies.  Babies don’t hate, hold grudges or seek revenge, they love, explore and discover.  It’s as they grow older that they decide something is wrong with them that needs to be fixed.  They get caught up in their disempowering interpretations believing them to be the truth and deeming themselves things like being unworthy, unlovable or all alone.

We ALL started out the same way and we ALL have collected fears and false beliefs about ourselves throughout our lives.  Everyone is not in the same place in terms of their development and growth, but we are so much more similar than we are different in every way.

Now, this isn’t to say to invite people who bring you down into your life.  I actually think that’s detrimental to your well being and talked about this in a recent entry, The Importance of Surrounding Yourself with Great People.  But I do think it provides an interesting perspective on how we treat one another and encouragement to further develop our capacity for kindness.

It’s a great reminder (for me and hopefully for you too) to treat one another as we want to be treated.  Because we are the same.  I know I don’t always remember this but I do realize how important it is to hold on to the awareness that we are all equal – that is where real compassion comes from – for both others as well as for ourselves.

I was in the elevator yesterday on my way back upstairs from lunch break while serving jury duty.  I had a long ride up so I decided to check out the situation, warmly observing the people around me.

Have you ever noticed how people act when they’re in a crowded elevator?  They couldn’t possibly look more like a bunch of shifty characters.  Eyes averted, bodies turned away from one another, trying their best to avoid any possibility of human interaction, biding their time until they can escape the torture.

Not a single person out of at least 8-10 made eye contact with me.

How funny is this? Or perhaps it’s sad.

Are we really that disconnected from one another that 30 seconds of conversation, eye contact or even simply an acknowledgment of each others existence is that painful?  And of course God forbid it be while trapped in a small enclosed space.

What are we really avoiding everyone for?  What if your soul mate was nestled within one of those dozens of people you avoid interacting with on a daily basis?  Or your new best friend?  Or your next significant mentor, client, or boss?

To be transparent, plenty of the time I’m just as guilty as everyone else of not taking advantage of the opportunity to get related to others. I’m just reflecting on it and realize that chances are, I’m missing out on some amazing opportunities to let people make a difference in my life.  I believe even the smallest interaction can make an impact and I can think of plenty of folks I only had one interaction with that taught me something new which made a lasting and sometimes life altering impression. If we are evolved enough to see the importance of self actualization, learning, and growth, we can pretty safely say that the true test of living from love and our highest self resides within the way we relate to others.

Yet then we avoid others at all costs.

Talk about squandering opportunities.

I received a comment on my post “What it’s like to be hypnotized” asking me the question, ‘What do you see the future of this blog being?’.

I really started this blog with the vision and intention of sharing the work I do with the world in a way anyone can afford (free!). Another reason is because I love to write and want to write books one day – so it was a good place to get the ball rolling.

I do a ton of transformational and higher consciousness work and one of the things I’ve learned is that we gain SO much inspiration, courage and insight through the window into others lives we are granted when they generously share their inner processes with us.

Granted, everything I write is of course based on my perspective.  However, I truly do believe that my candid sharing of the work I do, the experiences I have, and the transformative things I learn along the way have the capacity to impact and affect the lives of my readers in a way that makes a real difference for them.

I can’t accurately predict what this could or may be molded into in the future.  But I intend for the purpose to always be in making a difference for others through transformative work.  Currently?  I suspect it will remain a place to share my process and let others take what value they see available to them through an honest look into the introspective work of a life coach and leader of one of the finest coaching programs in the world.

If you enjoy reading it, please share it with your friends and loved ones!  You never know what will be the catalyst for someone to transform their life.  I believe the opportunity and space exists within these posts for folks to step into the possibility of living their lives fully expressed.

Thank you friend for your contribution and curiosity through asking!

In regards to subscribing, if you’re doing so by email, remember to go to actually go to your email to confirm your subscription once you enter it here.  And please keep commenting and asking questions!

My sister (God bless her) nudged me that I hadn’t yet written a post today and needed to get on it. (Said in much kinder, gentler terms, but absolutely needed and appreciated).

If I haven’t mentioned this already, I graduated from, and now lead, one of the best coach training programs in the country.  My apologies if I have and I’m boring you to death with my emphatic endorsement of this company (Accomplishment Coaching).  It meets once a month, Saturday and Sunday, 10am-6pm for the participants, 8am-8pm for us, the leaders.  As such, these weekends are inevitably incredibly intense and rigorous, calling forth your highest and greatest self and blatantly reflecting your survival strategies for getting by.  This is one of those weekends.

I found out today that what I was relating to as my breakthrough in leadership was really just a breakthrough in managing whatever is thrown my way.  You may have already deduced that. You may have not. I for one was thrilled enough with my job managing things that this was most definitely not what I wanted or expected to hear.

Again, leadership takes a lot of willingness to ‘work on it’.

I have NO idea what leadership looks like from a place other than ‘the rules’, ‘managing’, or ‘how’, or even what the hell to do with this idea.  But I do know that it’s the next step for me to have a breakthrough in (and develop) my leadership.

What was reflected to me is that I manage things and follow the rules/instructions (really well) rather than make up my own rules and creatively (and spontaneously) create.  Which, of course, is then what I was invited to practice. So this is what I’m now taking on.

On a somewhat separate (or not) note, I had a breakthrough in my relationship to connecting with others(!).  I realized that I’ve held on (against?) people that in order to prove their friendship to and connect with me, they should succumb to or accept my invitation to be a part of my life via getting together when I propose plans or supporting me in some way or another.  The breakthrough was in realizing exactly how much others are going through in their own lives.  That they don’t (always, or maybe even usually?) have it all together and are juggling a lot of balls in the air.  When I really got present to this, all that I could see or recognize was my complete and utter compassion and love for them.  I suddenly understood that being wrapped up in my own experience, I’d made it all about me.  I wanted THEM to do something WITH or FOR me to prove they loved me.  The ‘kerplunk’ moment was realizing, ‘Oh my God, what can I do FOR THEM?!?!?‘  And actually asking them for what they needed and how I could support them in their lives.

See, what I realized was, that in the bigger sense, all I wanted was connection.  And that I was making connection all about me.  When I was able to get ‘responsible’, or ‘at cause’, for creating connection by connecting TO THEM, instead of waiting for them to connect to me, my mind was blown. I realized I can get the same outcome I’ve been searching for through my own actions, rather than waiting for someone else to ‘get it right’ or ‘figure it out’.  And it’s infinitely more powerful, more connected and more loving.

Talk about a life altering realization… I’m sure my friends will be thrilled.