Jaclyn Beckerman Coaching

Hello folks – it’s been awhile, I know.  I apologize for falling off the radar.  It’s been an amazing and very busy summer filled with friends, fun, inspiration and adventure.  As many of you know I’m off to travel the world for a year and a half and my journey essentially begins Sunday.

Here’s the breakdown… I’m driving cross-country for a week with a couple friends, going to a festival in Nevada for a week, CA for a month, Austin, TX for 5 days, then South America for 6 1/2 months.  In South America I’ll be going to Peru, Bolivia, Chile, Argentina, Uruguay, Brazil then in Central America, Panama and Costa Rica.  Then I’ll return to NY/NJ for 2 months to visit friends and family.  Then Africa (South Africa, Zambia, Zimbabwe & Egypt – perhaps more) for 2-3 months and Southeast Asia (India, Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam & Indonesia) for 6-7 months.  Phew!

I’ll be starting another blog just to update everyone on my life in transit and will note the web address on here for those who are interested and want to follow.

I will still be coaching/working with clients while I travel and I already have the phone issue sorted out.

So why am I sharing this here? Here’s the thing – I’ve had countless people express to me how envious they are of my life.  What I tell them?  If you want it too, do it. The life you live depends solely on the choices you make.  So what DO you want?

The fact that I am now taking on my life’s dream of world travel was NOT predictable 2 years ago.  Before I started coaching and being coached, doing the work to get out of my own way and create a life I love – where my fears don’t run the show – I was slighty uncomfortable going to the movies or dinner alone.  Traveling the world by myself would have been unthinkable.  I’ve always been pretty independent but if you told me this would be my life 2 years ago I would have wistfully laughed and sighed “I wish”.

What I’ve learned is that your life is happening now.  You cannot wait for someone else to hand you the life you want.  Or for it to just fall in your lap.  You will spend your whole life waiting.  You have to commit to creating it and then actually do what you say you’re going to do.  Take the actions there are to take.  Figure out what you want – set a date for by when it will happen and put one foot in front of the other.

If you want world travel, buy an around the world travel guide and start planning.  If you want the relationship of your dreams, play a game with yourself of how many dates you can go on in a week.  If you hate your job, re-vamp your resume and start sending it out today.  It is no one’s responsibility but your own to create the things you want in your life.  No one will do it for you – they’re too busy moaning and groaning about not having the life THEY want.

Stop talking about living a great life and start living it.  The time is always now.  And you are more than capable. Walk the talk.

I notice that people always seem to have some serious crazy resistance to normal well being practices related to their businesses – consistently taking vacation time off, working regular business hours (it doesn’t really matter whether they’re 9-5 or 1-9 – but regular), not working on weekends and so on and so forth.

I’ve always thought I’ve been really good about this myself.  I don’t take clients or prospects on weekends, I don’t schedule calls outside of 9:30a-6:30p and I will definitely take a few vacations a year (even if that means a staycation like it is this week).  Yet I really was just choosing not to count the email I answered here, the appointment I took the time to schedule there, the phone call I answered or returned outside my regular hours.  Even worse, I’ve known it’s important for me to take a day off for well being after using all my energy coaching for an entire weekend (leading the coach training program) and have still kept a regularly scheduled client on my Monday roster, or allowed myself to do *just one* consultation and answer emails.  I am committing to give that up and honor my time off as what it is, time to re-fuel and take care of myself.

The fact is, not holding your time off as sacred impedes on you building a strong and powerful foundation for which to operate on top of.

Most people cannot bring themselves to give their body, mind and spirit time to rest, play and rejuvenate for fear of losing business or upsetting a client or some other plausible excuse.

Yet then you’re really just trying to support your clients or business from a place of depletion.  Where your needs are not met, you’re not taken care of and you’re operating on top of a foundation filled with gaping holes and perhaps some duct tape trying to hold it all together.  Taking care of your well being builds a strong foundation for which to go generate possibility and success.  Without it, you’re trying to make a cross country journey running on fumes.

So stop lying to yourself saying you have to work more in order to build your business.  If your business is suffering it’s because you’re suffering.  And if it’s doing alright with with you overworking and overexerting yourself, consider it could be doing fantastic if you were operating as the powerhouse you could be during the specific times you designate to be working.

Start with taking back your weekends.  Then regular working hours. You’re like a rechargeable battery that you’ve currently only been giving a few minutes to recharge every times it dies, you’re then never operating at full power.  Start committing to recharging fully and just watch the difference it makes in your business.

This might speak more to those who have their own businesses than it will to those who work 9-5 in an office or at least don’t work on commissions but consider that no matter what your working situation is, there’s still a desperate need for you to be taking care of your well being consistently and reliably.  What difference do you see it could make in your life?

Simple, yet profound.

I only (finally) read this wonderful little book Don Miguel Ruiz a couple months ago and I really loved it.

Essentially the four agreements described in the book are:

1. Be impeccable with your word.

2. Don’t take anything personally.

3. Don’t make assumptions.

4. Always do you best.

I have these posted in my apartment which is what made me think of it to share.

Factoring in that I’m not a Buddhist monk I certainly haven’t mastered these nor am I fluent in living them.  But when I am present to them, I find they make a significant impact.  They may seem overly simple, even obvious, yet at the same time they seem to be some of the most difficult concepts to follow.

What if you always did what you said you were going to do?  Or if you never said something you didn’t mean.  What if you understood and believed that anything anyone else says or does is not about YOU and doesn’t mean anything about you – it’s completely about them and their life.  What if you never assumed what someone or something meant and actually communicated effectively, getting 100% clear on the meaning before drawing any conclusions?  What if you always did your best – even if it didn’t always lead to the results you intended?

How would your life be different?

I really believe that if we just followed these four simple concepts, our lives would all transform.  Giving us everything we’ve ever imagined we could have wanted and more.

Try that on for size.

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On a complete side note: Someone told me yesterday that I’m really motivated as a response to reading my blog.  I find this really amusing because sometimes it feels like I’m anything but motivated.  Yet, I realize two things.  1. That from the outside looking in, I probably do look pretty motivated.  2. I definitely don’t acknowledge myself enough for all that I DO do. (Welcome back Taskmaster Jaclyn).  I think that’s probably a big ‘missing’ for me.  I set up great structures in some parts of my life and only minimally acknowledge myself for them and then get lazy about the other areas. There’s probably a connection between my lack of acknowledgment and my lack of creating new things. Ironically, I talk to my clients about rewarding themselves for their triumphs, however small they might be, yet seem to be spotty about giving myself this same treatment.  Sounds like there’s something new to take on…

PS. If you were hoping to hear about my karmic healing, I will be sharing about it another day when I have more time to articulate it.  I originally wrote today’s post yesterday.