Jaclyn Beckerman Coaching

“Success is moving from failure to failure without the loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

I so frequently stop or get stagnant when the stench of failure wafts into my life so as to avoid being enmeshed by it at all costs.  In actuality, this is a surefire way to avoid ever being successful.

You HAVE to fail over and over again in order to learn how to create success for yourself.  Failures provide learning and growth.  They simply reflect something that did not work and point you in the direction of what will.

Yet most of us consider them to be these big, scary, horrible experiences.  We spend so much time and energy avoiding having to deal with failure that we never even get the chance to show how naturally creative and powerful we are.

The cosmic joke is that we’re meant to develop and evolve; to expand our capacity for love, compassion, patience and generosity.  But we want all that juicy end stuff without any of the work it takes to get there.  Yet it takes work.  And that work involves lots and lots of ‘failures’.

What I see for myself is that if I truly start welcoming failures, it would diffuse some of the anxiety and significance I’ve created around the expectation I currently have of what the experience has to be.  Places where I’ve feared hearing answers I don’t want to hear, or fear that I won’t actually make a difference, will no longer be so confronting because I wouldn’t be pre-planning the lashing I’d give myself if things don’t go smoothly.  Because as I’ve mentioned before, I’m highly skilled at beating myself up.  I think if I go from failure to failure enthusiastically, it will be life-giving.  I will be able to step into absolutely anything without judgment or predisposed conceptions of how it has to go.  From that place, success is inevitable.

What would be in it for you to take on failing masterfully?  What space do you see might open up for you if your view shifted from failure as disastrous to failure as delightful?

I closed my eyes on the subway today.  I had music on at the time and just focused on nothing but the music.  What I realized is that I can quite easily create spaciousness and peace even when I’m surrounded by dozens of people I don’t know.

It’s similar to the sensation I get from being at Siddha Yoga.  I’m chanting and meditating with a room full of people (there they’re doing the same) and the only time I’m really present to being surrounded by folks is if I open my eyes.  The difference there is the warm feeling of unity and belonging you get from being surrounded by others who are committed to raising their spiritual awareness and consciousness.

It’s amazing to me though how closing my eyes and getting present in the moment shifts my mind frame and attitude.  I wasn’t particularly flustered or anything on the subway but the stark contrast of before and after closing my eyes and going within was certainly notable.  Afterward I felt more connected and at ease.

It’s wonderful to experience because just a couple years ago I adamantly proclaimed that I couldn’t meditate even though I wanted to and believed it could be useful in helping me focus and find some inner calmness.

It makes me wonder how quickly other folks give up trying to meditate after a handful of failed attempts.  Have you ever tried?  If you did try and gave up, how much of a shot did you really give it?

I ask because there was a time when I was one of those people who had given up on it. Knowing now the difference it has made in my life – and the difference it has made in many others lives based on various discussions I’ve had – I easily and whole-heartedly recommend it to anyone.

There are so many studies on the benefits of meditation.  Here are just a couple articles that discuss how meditating can make you more intelligent because it increases the size of your brain and how it calms your emotional response system.

There are many forms of meditation.  So if just shutting your mind off for an extended period of time seems daunting or difficult, you could try starting with visual meditation or mindful meditation where you focus on a particular feeling or word – or even just smile the entire time.  Shutting your mind off entirely from it’s regular whirring seems to be the most challenging but many say it just takes practice and a commitment to keep trying and expanding your capacity for it even if/when you struggle with it.

Meditating has been credited with such accolades as lowering stress, anxiety, and depression and increasing happiness. But regardless of how you take it on and learn, it sure seems as though the benefits outweigh the effort you have to put in.

What value do you see for yourself in calming or pausing your mind’s constant churning and actually being still and present for any extended period of time?  What difference might it make in your life to start practicing some focused attention inwards without the judgmental or critical eye of your ego mind?

If you do meditate regularly, what benefits have you gained from the practice?

Personally, I believe it’s made me calmer and significantly more capable of being at ease regardless of the situation or circumstance I’m currently in.  It’s also helped me become more spacious and unattached to any particular outcome with people like potential clients or even with friends.  All absolutely worthwhile results.

I saw this weekend that I have a lot of charge/energy around the concept of being a “shitty coach” and “not being as good as others”.  If something triggers me to feel like either of those, I immediately shut down and start beating myself up for it. It goes back to a very young conversation that I’m just not good enough and don’t fit in.

I realized it’s not that any of that is at all true, or that anyone else believes that it’s true, but rather that I spend so much time trying to be NOT that, that I can’t actually get outside of it.  There’s some part of me deep down that must believe it could be true because there’s significant fear of being just that.

What I saw, with the help of a couple friends/colleagues, is that if I create it as a neutral place, I can then build, grow and learn from there.  For example, “Ok, so I’m a shitty coach.  Now what?” or “Ok, others are better than me. Now what?”.  At first I couldn’t even be with that concept.  But the reason I couldn’t be with it is because I think I shouldn’t be a shitty coach or inferior, and I am masterful at beating myself up about things I think ‘shouldn’t be’.

However, I realized that if I stopped beating myself up all the time, I would have infinite more space to be with people and to make a difference with my clients.  To really open my heart to others and allow it all.

What do you see for yourselves?

What are some hot buttons that trigger you to get angry or upset with yourself, that you just have a really hard time being with?

Often it’s the things that are the most charged for us that cause us to do everything in our power to not be that thing we fear.  Yet then we’re imprisoned by the belief that at our core we are in fact that thing.

It’s often easier to see in other people.  You almost inevitably know lots of people who beat themselves up for everything and anything possible.  They believe they’re not a good enough leader, they’re not attractive enough, cool enough, smart enough, strong enough, funny enough, etc.  So they do everything they can to compensate for what they imagined is wrong with them rather than be with that fear and create an opportunity to grow.

Well, you too.

What consequences do you see of living your life based on some kind of imaginary fear?

From there, what new way of being would you like to create instead?  Because that is what’s possible from taking ownership of your interpretations and actions.  That is where you can make a difference.

The soul doesn’t talk in language, it talks in feeling; in intuition, pulling or knowing towards something.

How often are we in conflict about things because what our head says isn’t what our heart wants?  The answers to your purpose and the path you’re meant to take in this life don’t reside in fear, judgment, or self-loathing.  They lie in going within, to that deep part within you that knows your higher truth and the vast array of abundance that is completely available to you.

Not everyone is willing to take this path though.  Lets be honest, it’s not the ‘easy’ path to take.  It’s so much easier to remain stagnant and stew in the comfort of our incompletions and dissatisfaction than it is to actually break free of those patterns and be responsible for how our life occurs for us.

Personally I stewed for SO long.  For most of my life in fact.  It’s definitely coaching, transformational and spiritual work that has pulled me out of my shitty little box of what was possible for me.  Actually, I always saw the bigger picture and the the possibility of life, I think I just didn’t really believe true happiness and fulfillment was possible for me in my heart.  I knew it was possible for everyone else but some core part of me didn’t believe that I deserved it too.

It’s mind-boggling for me to realize how far I’ve come from that place.  I may have understood intellectually before but didn’t truly get in my heart that love truly is all around you and within.  You don’t need something outside of yourself to tell you you’re worthwhile and lovable.  You, without even trying, just are.  Just like I am.  There are treasures and wisdom and riches within.  Yet I kept looking for things outside of me to justify my worth.  (Look for yourself here too – where are you doing that?)  The ironic thing is that if you know me, you’ve probably always known that I’m valuable and lovable, while not truly believing it about yourself.  Or at least having some form of ‘I’m not good enough’ persistently hanging out in your head.

Funny how we all think we’re so different, but we’re actually not.  We all have fears and insecurities.  We all go through breakdowns and think that ours are so unique… and no one has it as bad as we do… and it’s not fair… and why can’t we just be like everyone else who has it together?!

The big joke is that no one has it all together.  We’re all working out or own stuff and in the process of generating our lives.  We may be at different stages in the process or dealing with different kinds of problems.  (Case and point, Mother Theresa had way bigger problems than I do and was certainly more evolved on her journey of compassion, tender-heartedness and contribution – but I’d put money on that she still dealt with her own fears and ‘problems’ just like everyone else has to. Same with the Ghandi, the Dalai Lama, etc.   We’re human.)

All I’m saying is that when you see, own, and access all the love around and within you, you stop searching for it externally and start owning that you are responsible for and fully capable of creating the life you want.  Rev. Gold said “Once you’ve connected to the inner kingdom, the place from which stuff comes, you now have access to it.  You no longer have to worry about what channel to get it from next.”

So what I’ve taken is is to stop worrying – it’s ALL within.  And wow, are things just happening in my life.  I invite you to do it with me.

I’m feeling the need to share that I don’t like talking about my business in my posts.  There’s something about looking good and avoiding looking bad that consistently keeps me from writing about wins (or breakdowns) or lessons I learn in my business.

I’ve taken my willingness to be vulnerable with people to a whole different level just by starting this blog yet it’s clear to me that I’m not sharing things that would definitely be of value to folks in order to save face or avoid being judged.  It’s funny because I imagine it’s easy for people to judge lots of the things I talk about in my posts anyway yet for some reason when it comes to my business, I get far more confronted than by other topics.

I think we all do this.  We don’t share authentically with everyone what’s really going on in certain areas of our lives because we judge that they should be going or certain way or shouldn’t be going however they are.

Something fabulous that one of my clients said today was that in looking at how things were in the past (actually just a few months ago), she saw that they had to go the way they did and she had to go through what she did in order to get where she is now.  And because of that, she could see that the process was perfect.  Because today she feels empowered and liberated from some limiting beliefs that had a stronghold on her for most of her life.  But couldn’t have gotten here without going through the muck.  By the same logic, you can’t get where you want to go without going through whatever is in the way and breaking it down.  So naturally then, where you are too is perfect.  And there’s simply still work to be done to get the results you want.

So the thing I want to share about my business today is that I’ve had a breakthrough in it recently.  I shared in my post, Give It All Away, that I finally understood that I wasn’t getting what I wanted in life because I wasn’t giving it to the universe.  I said I wanted to be a contribution and to have a thriving coaching practice but I certainly wasn’t consistently having new clients sign up.  What I see is that I was actually being really stingy with both myself and others – more interested in what I could gain for myself than what I could give away to others and life.

What I didn’t share about my experience that day at Sacred Center was that this understanding that I needed to give to the universe what I was looking to have myself really moved to give more than my usual $2 or $3 donation when they passed the baskets around.  Instead, I filled out a credit card slip and donated $20.  This may or may not seem like a huge deal to you but for me it was an act of giving away the thing I’d been struggling to bring in to myself to something I love – without the story of ‘I can’t afford to do this’ or ‘I need to save money’ or ‘This is irresponsible’ attached to it.  I was contributing to something I saw as wonderful in the world instead of looking to be contributed to.  And it felt great.  Her message (I recommend reading the post if you haven’t already) had really shifted my perception of who I was being in the world.

The magic, the reason this is so significant to share, is that the very next day, I had a new client hire me.  While I know I’m a great coach and provide a lot of value for people, actually bringing in new business had definitely not been my strong suit in the past.  So just believe me when I say that this blatant manifestation of the law of attraction was pretty phenomenal.

I have been living and being from this place ever since.  Very aware of my intentions and solely out to contribute to people whether they are friends, prospects, clients, colleagues or family.

This past Sunday at Sacred Center, when they passed the donation baskets around, I at first gave $3, then I decided that was too stingy and was compelled to give more and added another $5.  I also did a workshop which I knew I wanted to participate in and was another $10.  I only had one sample session set up for this week, my first since that last one.  Now THIS prospect, who is wonderful and my ideal client, hired me as well.

More and more I’m feeling confident and certain that my practice is going to thrive and I will be able to serve myself by serving others!  My dream is to support as many people as possible in transforming their lives to be the life of their dreams! (In the future that will also include books and inspirational speaking!) And I must say, living (and loving) from this place and creating this life is SO exciting and rewarding!

What do you see would be possible for YOU if you started living from a space of contributing rather than ‘getting your needs met’ or ‘what’s in it for you’?  (And lets be honest, ‘what’s in it for you’ tends to dominate most folks way of being whether they intend it to or not.)

Saturday I took the bus to Philly early in the morning to attend a 10am-5pm workshop with Brian Weiss.  Dr. Weiss is famous for his work with past life regression therapy and has written a handful of books on his experiences with patients using this tool for healing.

Throughout the day he talked about some past experiences and gave background information for those who weren’t familiar with his work and did a few experiential exercises with us including a couple past life regressions.

They would turn the lights very low and put on some soft background music and he would guide everyone into a trance (hypnosis) which is really just, as he mentioned, relaxed focused concentration.

In the first regression I saw myself as a king.  I was a large man and had a full white beard.  I was sitting in my throne and people were lined up to offer me gifts.  There were people lined up facing inward on either side of this procession as well.  I was very pleased to receive the gifts but I was not very generous in giving to the people which made them resentful.  It was like it was all about me and I didn’t really care about the other people.  The lesson for me to learn was that of being generous and giving to others the way I’d like to be given to in order to foster love, respect and unity.  When we fast forwarded to my death I saw that my throat was cut by my brother (who was my brother Michael in this lifetime) who wanted the throne for himself.

Later, in the second regression, I saw myself as a pregnant wife who had had a lot of trouble conceiving.  When I had the child it was a girl and my husband was angry about this because he wanted a boy.  He then forced me to have sex with him against my will repeatedly until I got pregnant again.  I felt worn out and beaten down, and died in childbirth giving birth to another girl.  I didn’t get to look into the lessons of this lifetime as we moved on to look at another.  Looking back on this now I think the lesson to learn is to express myself fully – it’s okay to get angry and it’s okay to rebel against people who treat me badly or things I don’t agree with or am not happy or comfortable with.  I notice this theme in other past lives I’ve seen recently as well.  In the past (in this lifetime too) I’ve tended to be somewhat submissive about accepting what other people want and not standing up for myself because I don’t want to rock the boat. I need to trust my gut and follow my instincts instead of allowing others to influence or dictate my thought process or actions. At this point I was a bit stuck on the images I had seen and was aware of someone having fallen asleep and snoring next to me and had trouble focusing on the images.  We had spirit guides, who I saw as two children, a boy and a girl, come to take us to our next destination.  There were 5 or 6 doors, each leading to a different time period, we were to walk through the door that called to us the most.  I went through the 20 BC door and found myself as a thin woman named Genevieve in Egypt wearing a white cloth robe and sandals.  I didn’t see anything else about the lifetime though.

Dr Weiss said that Karma basically means that what you sow is what you reap.  Actions have consequences and they come back to you until you learn the lesson.  Karma is there to teach you not to punish you.  Once you learn the lesson, the karma dissolves because you don’t need it anymore.  This is why past life regression therapy seems to work so well for people to dissolve fears, phobias and even illnesses, because by learning the lesson you are meant to learn, you complete the karma.

Another thing we did was partner up and exchange a personal item with our partner.  We then went a bit deeper into trance and looked for what images or messages we got from holding the object.  For my partner I got that he had been a boy scout when he was very young and his father had been a bit indifferent and emotionally flat towards him.  I got that he just wanted to be loved by his father but didn’t feel like he had that.  I also got that his father had passed away and was very sorry and regretted how he’d been towards his son and wanted him to know he loved him very much.  I also saw that he lived in a house – at first I saw a two story house and then a single story and then the idea of an apartment in the house even though I knew it wasn’t an apartment building.  My partner verified that all of this was really accurate which was pretty cool.  He’d been a boy scout, his father had died 4 years ago and had terribly regretted how he treated his family because he was always busy and away doing other things.  He also said he lived in a two story house but his grandparents lived on one floor and his family lived on the other which explains the different imagery with the house.  While I’ve read some people and looked at future events I hadn’t really looked at anyone’s past in their current lifetime so it was awesome to be able to confirm the accuracy of what I saw.

We also did an exercise that has you have a dialog with some illness you possess (physical, emotional or mental) in order to heal it.  I did it with ‘laziness’.  You ask the illness a bunch of questions and it answers and then you switch places with the illness.  What I got from this experience was that I’m afraid of getting so busy and so caught up in doing things that I won’t have time for fun, play, relaxing or well being.  So if I make it a priority to include those things and even maybe schedule them in, it will be easier for me to be productive and do the activities or tasks I know are important to do.

It was basically the kind of exercises I’ve already been doing/working with now but it’s always a fascinating experience and I got a lot out of being there.

I feel like many (most?) people don’t.  In fact, many people seem to actually hate themselves.  Which sounds really sad (and it is) but seems so frequently to be true.

I used to be one of those people. Who didn’t love myself and didn’t think I was lovable.  Now, until getting involved with transformational work, I didn’t actually realize I felt this way.  It was a core belief I had hidden away far below the surface, where I didn’t have to see it or do anything about it. I might have even denied it if I’d been asked and I certainly did my best to overcompensate for the belief by being confident and outgoing.

In fact, there are plenty (perhaps even the majority) of people who even when they do face the fact that they believe this (or something like it, ie: worthless, useless, etc), don’t want to do anything about it because they’re so terrified of change and the unknown that they’d rather have things stay the same, safe and comfortable albeit resigned and unsatisfying.

From that place, you’re always living a life of not being enough.  So naturally, nothing ever will be enough.  From there, you can only see what’s lacking and trying to fix what’s wrong.

When in reality, there’s nothing wrong with you at all and certainly nothing to fix.  You are complete and whole just as you are.  There may be some stuff (mainly beliefs) in the way of you living the life you want to live.  But it’s transforming those beliefs and your relationship to yourself, not ‘fixing’ them, that makes the difference.

This has been a long journey for me to come to this place where I DO love myself and am happy with who I am.  I may not have it all figured out yet, and there are of course still fears that come up within me, but inherently I believe that I am a loving contribution to the world and the world is lucky to have me.

A delightful result of this is that I’m actually being a very different person and attracting wonderful things into my life like new men, friends, clients, and venues that support my continual growth and contribute to me living a phenomenal life of my choosing.

A friend asked me how I possibly had so many men asking me out and said I needed to give lessons.  I told her she needs to learn to love herself first and the rest will follow.  I really believe that it’s only because I’ve finally accepted myself with compassion and love that I’m attracting so many great things into my life.  I’m sure you’ve heard the old adage that says, ‘you can’t love someone until you learn to love yourself’.  Well I believe that’s true, and additionally that it will be much more difficult for someone else to love you if you can’t love yourself.  How can someone else possibly give you what you deny giving yourself?

So answer for yourself honestly, how much do you really love you?  Could it be more?  What could you take on to increase your experience of self-love?  Because whether you’re willing to admit it or not, I bet everyone could use more love in their lives – and it truly does start with you.  Feel free to share below. <3

I do.  And I always get an answer.

When I talk to God (or if you prefer – spirit, universe, higher power, whatever works for you) it’s usually either in writing or in my head (which makes me feel slightly crazy sometimes).  But whatever I ask is ALWAYS answered immediately.  Usually in my own voice – but there’s always an answer there and that answer is not based in my fears or insecurities.

I’ve worked persistently to develop my ability to access my intuition and listen to what it says.  And so long as the answer is based in love and a stand for my greatness, I know it comes directly from spirit.  So whether you see it as my intuition, higher self or God – I believe that voice is connected to the universe in ways I don’t have evidence for and can’t explain.  That’s part of why they call it faith, don’t you think?

There have been (and still are) many times where I’ve ignored my inner compass, which consistently gives me the answers I’m need (although not always the ones I want) and provides incredible guidance.  Often this is because my head wants one thing and my heart wants another.  Although, time and time again, my heart proves to be right whether I listen to it or not.

It’s interesting how adamant we can be about ignoring this inner knowing or understanding.  We seem to be more committed to that disempowering voice in our head that tells us we’re not good enough than we are to being our greatness.  Which, absurd as it may seem, makes perfect sense.  It’s safer and easier to hang out in our comfort zone wrapped up in our fears where we don’t have to change or do anything differently.  But the life you want, if you don’t already have it, doesn’t exist within what you already know.  So for those of us who are brave enough to face the unknown with love, change it is.

What does your intuition tell you?  How do you speak to God?

It blows my mind how many men have been asking me out lately.

Out of the woodworks, guys have been coming up to me and asking me out.

This hasn’t always been the case.  Although men certainly have asked me out plenty in the past this is a pretty noticeable surge.

What I realize is that the more I’ve come to love me, and the more I’ve shown myself to others without caring what they think, the more I seem to be attractive to others without even trying.

Basically, I’ve finally realized that I am a catch.  I am a pretty phenomenal woman and any guy would be lucky to have me.  Not in a stuck up, cocky or conceited way, I finally realize that I am valuable, interesting and perfect just as I am.  This isn’t to say that I don’t have more to learn and further to grow, but that whatever I believe, think or feel is perfectly alright and i can be completely candid about it without worrying I won’t be accepted.

That’s always been one of my things.  Before getting into transformational and higher consciousness work, I was SUCH a people pleaser.  I worried far too much about what people thought of me and was more interested in telling them what I thought they wanted to hear than I was open to telling them what I really thought or felt.

I’ve finally gotten comfortable in my own skin and confident enough to know that whatever I feel, think, or believe is valid and okay.  There is absolutely no reason to pretend to be someone I’m not.

And the end result?  I’m happy.  I keep getting present to being completely and totally satisfied with where I’m at and how my life is going.  Even though I don’t currently have everything I want and haven’t yet gotten where I want to be.  Things are good, and I’m happier than I’ve ever been.  And I’d say that’s pretty fantastic in the grand scheme of how life can go.

I had my intuitive tools class with Deganit Nuur today.  Deganit is a gifted intuitive reader who went to school for it and is now teaching folks who are interested how to do it themselves.  It’s essentially a lot of visual meditation and allowing your intuition to express itself to you either visually or by thoughts that come to you.  She does the class in 4 levels with three 3-hour classes per level at $150 for class.

I’ve used the techniques/tools just for myself to ground and bring in good energy as needed which is amazing and it’s also useful for gaining insights from past events, making decisions or attracting something into your life.

Today we learned how to look at relationships in our lives and learn what’s going on in them and how they’re serving us as well as how they’ll develop in the future.  We also learned how to go look at past events that have occurred and see what there is to learn from them (or to learn from our past selves or what we have to say to our past selves).

It’s a small class this time with just two of us learning so we’re doing it at my place.  One girl had to leave a bit early so at the end Deggi and I read each other.  I of course won’t share about her reading since it’s not mine to share but I will tell you a bit about mine!  I’m just going to share one thing she saw in my current life and then share what she saw looking into one of my past lives.

Again, Deggi is amazing at doing readings.  We talked about my friendships and she described one of the girls she recognized as me having a really close friendship with in the future.  She saw someone who had long dark hair & fair skin who really doesn’t care about what others think about her.  She’s a very bold person, is not a people pleaser at all and will always give it to me straight and I know that she completely still loves me and accepts me for who I am.  She said she is not very open to the metaphysical stuff that I’m into (it’s kind of weird to her) but is curious about it and there’s a part of her that is into the idea of it and it’s inspiring to her.  She helps me not care about what others think and own my space more and I help her with her spirituality and her softer side.  I probed with some questions asking if I already knew this person and she got a ‘yes and no’ saying I may have met her a few times but don’t really know her and we don’t have friends in common.  Then she said I may have met her in a gym class (I gasped).  Then I asked if I had ever been friends with her before and she said she ‘got a huge yes’. I told her I knew who it was!  She asked who and I said my friend Jen (to which she got a yes).  I met her in the gym before school started in 8th grade! She was one of my closest friends when I was young and then we grew apart and just reconnected a month ago. (Jen has admitted that she’s not very open to the metaphysical but is very interested to learn more about it because I’m so passionate about it.  The rest of the description of her is pretty accurate as well.)  So I thought this was incredibly cool validation for what she was seeing because there’s no possible way she could have known all this stuff about this friend.

On to the past life part.  I also asked if I’d been a princess in a past life (if you’ve read my past posts, this has come up for me more than once) and she said yes and then looked into the life that came up for her. She saw me at around 9 years old.  I always got what I wanted (funny because my sister recently said I was put on this planet to get what I want) and I was running around the castle, not very well behaved (frustrating for my caretakers).  I knew the rules but thought, ‘whatever I’m a princess’, so I ignored the smaller rules and acted instead on the bigger picture I saw around me.  I was gifted at seeing the bigger picture and it benefited me mentally, emotionally & spiritually to act on that but would frustrate others, which in turn would frustrate me. When looking into what year and country it was she saw Scotland in 1866.  (Which was also incredibly interesting because if you check out my post on my recent past life regression session, my cousin commented on it saying when she went to Scotland in 2005 she had a really strong feeling she’d been there before! (They say your soul tends to reincarnate with the same group of souls many times)).

She saw my sister now (Jen) as a little boy who wasn’t royalty but was a good friend who I would play with (who was just as naughty as I was).  For me he represented freedom and the ability to just play and be a kid and for him I represented a lot of acceptance.  He didn’t have that many friends (and especially not royalty) so it was really special for him that I was a princess and wanted to be his friend.  (Though I played the princess card sometimes, ‘my way or the highway’, which didn’t bother him.)  My current parents were caretakers of mine in this lifetime but not the king and queen – my mother as my caretaker was really patient with me.  The king was a boyfriend of mine in this lifetime, either past or future but she thinks future.

My gift is seeing the bigger picture but I have to realize that I’m still living in the smaller picture too.  There are still rules I do need to go by just to make it so it works out for everyone (although in the grand scheme of things I don’t need to but it makes my personal life a lot easier if I follow the systems already set up).  It’s easier to be in the now than just try/want to jump to the future since I don’t have the tools to jump to the future.

The lesson for this lifetime was that that if I’d just go sit in the princess chair for 5 minutes (instead of running away from it every time they tried to put me there) it would actually take a lot less time than my running from it and being brought back constantly which would end up taking 15 minutes – ie. what there is for me to learn in this lifetime is PATIENCE (which has come up for me before).

I asked if I’d been a princess in other lifetimes and she counted 5.  I also asked how many lives I’ve lived and she said she a lot – hundreds.  My sister and I have joked that we were probably married in a past life (which she got a huge yes for – but not this particular life as a princess) and that she was my mother in a past life as well (which she also got a yes for).  The two biggest things for me to learn in my current lifetime are patience and trust.  I can never know what people are thinking and it will be huge for me to just enjoy the silence, know how I feel about them and let that hold more value than how I think they feel about me.  It would be a huge lesson for me to put the emphasis on me and what I’m getting out of it instead of trying to figure out what they think/feel about me.

Seriously, Deganit is AMAZING!  If you’re interested in doing a session with her you can go to her website and contact her here.